Mental Health,  Personal Growth

How Self-Doubt Can Cripple You In Life

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How does self-doubt cripple you in life?
It can’t literally cripple you but it can definitely hinder you from doing the things you love.

We all have wants, needs, and dreams.

Ever dream of being an artist one day but after listening to other artists just like you makes you feel insecure?
Ever wanted to start an online business but with so many experts out there, you wonder if people would listen to you?
Ever wanted to be beautiful or handsome enough for someone you love but you can’t compete with good-looking or attractive people who are currently flirting with them?

But we always feel like this…

You dreamed and wanted these things for yourself but there’s something inside you that is slowly creeping inside of you and making you feel overwhelmed.
This kept you from moving forward.
You kept on asking yourself if you are good enough.
You kept on asking yourself if you are smart enough.
You tend to compare yourself to other people’s skills, abilities, traits & much more.
With all these things inside your head, you feel stuck. You end up deciding whether you want to give up or continue on your dream or journey.

My Story (Short)

I was just like you. When I was on dates, I would always tell myself that I am not perfect enough. I am not good and attractive enough for this person. I tend to run away or back out until I never dated anyone for a very long time.

Especially when I started The Eleanor Journal, I was hesitant about building and starting it because I am not a personal growth & development expert. I started to doubt myself to the point that I needed to validate my worth to others ask myself this horrible question “Why should they listen to me when they can listen to experts?”.

This has kept me in the dark for weeks until it continued for more than 2 months. That is what we call self-doubt.

This Thing inside me

Having doubt on yourself can sometimes cripple you on the inside specifically on your mind if you aren’t able to fully overcome it. It is keeping you from achieving your goals and dreams in life. 

Self-doubt is a fear of failure. You can feel self-doubt before you even begin your journey or if you are in the middle of your journey. Sometimes, if you experienced either a major or minor challenge but failed to accomplish this task, you begin to feel self-doubt and there’s a slight chance of standing up again after a defeat or failure.

Here are a few reasons that may have caused you to feel self-doubt and how you can keep yourself from feeling self-doubt:

How Self-Doubt Can Cripple You In Life

1.) Dwelling on the past.

There are memories that you love to love, love to hate, love to forget and love to remember but there are also memories that haunt you until the present day. This could be from broken relationships to sudden accidents to past failures.

This could be any past experiences that can hurt delay your progress to move forward with what you want to do in life. You can’t change the past but you can definitely learn from it and use it to help you grow.

2.) Childhood experience.

You could have parents that tell you that you are not good or smart enough throughout your childhood and maybe until college. They always based it on your grades, passions, and interests.

If they don’t agree with you what you do, they would make you feel like you are good enough in their eyes. This can affect your adulthood because you will constantly doubt yourself and may even think about other people’s views on you whether they would think about you as worthy enough for them.   

You don’t need to seek anyone’s approval. You are your own person. You can ask for their blessings and understanding but you must decide what you want in life.

3.) You vs. Them.

It’s good to compare yourself to other people to learn more about what you need to improve. This could be from looks to possessions to friends but if you keep on comparing yourself to them with what you can’t have, you will start to lose yourself and this will sometimes lead to doubt.

You are different from them. They are different from you. In short, we all live in different lives. Always be appreciative with what you have by practicing gratitude every day.

4.) Fear of Doing.

Once you feel doubtful in yourself, you might feel stuck on thinking whether you want to move forward or not. You are afraid to fail again. You must take a risk. Instead of thinking & doubting whether you want to continue or feel unworthy of yourself – skills and abilities, just start moving or take action with what you want to do.

Recommended Post: 25 Things To Let Go Of Right Now

5.) Fear of Failure.

You are afraid to fail again. Just accept it. Failure can sometimes make you feel down and may even question your capabilities. It might take a beer or two for a couple of weeks or months to move on from failure depending on how high the goal was.

If you fail on the task or goal, just accept the failure, learn from it and move forward. If you still want to achieve the same dream or goal, just try until you decide to give up.

How You Can Keep Yourself
From Feeling Self-Doubt:

1.) Live today.

Live yourself at the moment. Live yourself in the present. Don’t dwell too much from the past. Let go of your fears and doubts. Think about what you can do for today.

2.) Trust in yourself.

You are your own worst critic. Have faith in yourself. Believe in your strengths and skills. Believe that you can do what others can and can’t do.

3.) Accept who you are.

Accept who you are as a whole and start loving yourself. You must remember that no one is perfect in this world. Everyone has strengths and flaws. You just need to be you by building confidence in yourself.

4.) Be positive.

You know that doubting yourself brings negative thoughts to yourself. You need to remind yourself that you are capable of doing the things you want to do in life by listing down your accomplishments. You can practice positive affirmations every day to help you stay positive.

Recommended Post: Here Are 50 Daily Positive Affirmations You Can Practice Right Now

The Eleanor Journal was built.

Within those two months, I started to really doubt myself but at the same time, I did not lose hope so I started researching about competitors and found out that most of them aren’t experts. They are just like me who were two steps ahead from their readers and subscribers.

It was not that easy but I started to believe in myself. I may not be perfect and beautiful enough but I learn to accept it and started taking better care of myself. I started gaining confidence little by little and eventually, I built The Eleanor Journal. Although it wasn’t perfect enough, I still launched it because I learned to accept the way it is because I know I can improve it.

Having self-doubt every now and then is understandable but if it keeps you from doing the things you love or even accomplishing your goals, you will never be able to fully bring and share your own creations to the world. You only have one life – just go for what you want to do in life. 

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Eleanor Wabe is the creator behind The Eleanor Journal, a digital platform of stories about personal growth, mental health, self-improvement, spiritual growth & self-care to help uplift your body, mind, soul, and heart.

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